I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
