i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize