Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
