I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
