I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
this just has baby written all over it
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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