Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Randomize