How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
they're like a gay fantastic four
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
