I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
