Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Randomize
