I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize