i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
