her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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