Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
