I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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