Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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