but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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