you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
