I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
