Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
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he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
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I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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