white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
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