we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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