dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
