Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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