I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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