But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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