member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Drunk walkin through police station. America
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
