Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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