Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's gonorrhea incarnate
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize