I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
