where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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