Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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