small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
