what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Randomize
