dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Randomize
