I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize