HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize