Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize