Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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