hotel room ftw
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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