By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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