I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
this must be what syphilis tastes like
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....