I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
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