i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
