I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
