he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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