Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
