two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
