Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
