captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
