he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
