New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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